For centuries, dogs have maintained their hegemony over cats in human-critter relationships, and have earned themselves the title of man’s best friend. But a quick look through Reddit and 4chan (or Instagram and Facebook, if that’s your fancy) suggests that the tide may be turning - with the abundance of cat photos and cat memes. And that it’s entirely possible that cats are the more superior of the two.
These curious little bundles of warmth and fuzz, with their wispy whiskers and limitless permutations of colorful patches, spots and stripes, could very well become the subjects of a new subclass of photography (feline photography?). Under the right lighting conditions, a ginger fuzzball could melt men and women life has been the harshest on.
But it’s easy to be fooled by the magical properties of the cat’s exterior that entraps and bounces light off it in ways that make you want to confirm its existence with your touch. Hidden underneath their irresistible ‘aww’-inspiring radiance might exist a being that may very well have seen more of life than you ever will. It’ll sit. And it will stare – silently, and from head to toe. Those deep, dark slits that reach into the most uncharted recesses of your soul hold the power to make you question any assumptions you’ve made about who you truly are (and compel you to ask whether your choice in footwear really is that piteous; lose the Crocs, will ya?).
And while they lounge over a cluttered heap of freshly-washed towels that you had left neatly folded on the couch just moments ago, there’s little you would be able to do. Should you come too close, they will slice through the air in one graceful leap from the couch to the TV table that would put humankind’s best gymnasts to shame.
Perhaps they are onto something that dogs are far too naïve to grasp – the meaning of life or the secret to world dominance? They simply seem to understand the makings and failings of humans better. Maybe one day, they will use our obsession with them and spring an attack when we are too busy farming internet brownie points with cat photos. But until then, it might not be a bad idea to convert into a cat person, and give those infinitely mysterious, astoundingly sagely, regal little things a chance over our more familiar canine friends.
I should warn you, though, that cats are hardly the stuff of halos and harps, and are way more intimately connected to the world of the paranormal. If you see a cat staring into the darkness behind you with a chilling glint in its eyes, you may have just swung the wrong way . But then again, in the event that you are disturbed by a visitor from the other side, it’s probably the cat and not the unassuming dog that would succeed in negotiating a deal with it to let you be.